Consider yourself warned!
A guide for those who think they want children.
|
|
I have discovered that teenagers have a weird sense of smell. I’d almost say that they don’t smell anything at all, but I know that they can smell. They always seem to be able to smell when I’m cooking. I know this because they seem to find their way to the kitchen to ask me what am I cooking, and when will it be done. Anything with a good odor, they can smell it.
What baffles my mind is that somehow, they can’t smell things that are foul or just smell bad. For example, someone is cooking. I can smell it burning in my bedroom. However, the child that is standing in the kitchen, right next to the stove, reading or playing on their phone, can’t smell anything. All I can say is thank God the batteries in the smoke detector works! Its not just burnt food they can’t smell, its garbage and body odor too. Once when I came home from work, my son was having his piano lesson (the piano teacher was a young man). I could smell the garbage before I got to the front door. I couldn’t understand why someone didn’t take it out. I asked both my son and his piano teacher if they smelled the garbage. They both just looked at me with blank stares. When my son comes home from basketball practice, he doesn’t realize just how funky he is, and I don’t mean funky in a let’s go party, good way! When he walks in the room after basketball practice, you want to make the sign of the cross, sprinkle some holy water around, and burn incense. That’s how bad he smells. Then, he has the nerve to want to give me a big hug! Can you believe that? Like I want to be anywhere near that foul funk. At least he has a sense of humor. I appreciate that because when he comes near me, I hold out my hand and tell him that I don’t want him coming near me until after he takes a shower. He just laughs, opens his arms out wide, and says, “Oh Mommy, I just want to give you a hug.” I tell him to put his arms down, no one wants to smell that! This kid takes the train home from basketball practice. I can only imagine what the poor people in his subway car must go through. Especially since he’s riding with his friends who have played basketball with him. Can you imagine the smell coming from 2 or 3 teenage boys that just finished playing basketball? Yuck!! At first, I thought it was just a boy thing, but I have since learned that teenage girls are just as bad, at least mine can be. I would have thought that it would be different with girls, but apparently its not. Teenage girl funk can be just as bad as teenage boy funk. One day, my daughter came to give me a hug. While she was hugging me, I started smelling something. I wondered, “What the hell is that smell?” Then it dawned on me, ooooh, it’s my daughter. I asked her, “Do you not smell yourself?” Of course not! I told her that she needed to go take a shower and make sure that she puts some deodorant on. I also told her to make sure that she puts the shirt she was wearing in the wash. Man, summer is just starting and these kids are going to be spending time in the sun. I must get my stash of candles ready. Just remember, if you are thinking about having kids, or already do, make sure you get your stash of candles, incense, or air freshener ready. You’re going to need it. So, now you know and you can …. Consider Yourself Warned!
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
SassyGirlTye lives with her two wonderful teenagers in Brooklyn, New York. No matter what she says in her posts, she truly loves her children with all her heart.
|