Consider yourself warned!
A guide for those who think they want children.
Here we are, two weeks away from Christmas! Can you believe it’s almost here? I can’t. It seems like it sneaks up on me every year. And of course, I have not started Christmas shopping yet. You would think that I would know better by now than to wait to the last minute.
I know you people who don’t have kids are probably thinking, “Come on SassyGirlTye, Christmas happens at the same time every year. You know its coming. Besides, you have kids. I’m sure they remind you that ‘Santa’ is coming.” Well, that may be true, but believe you me, Christmas, as well as it’s cousin Thanksgiving, always seem to catch me by surprise.
If I could just plan better, I could actually do the Christmas gift shopping early. But that never happens. There’s just so many other things going on. School starts in September, and I try to get back into the swing of things. In October, I have to mentally adjust to the upcoming projects and reports that will eventually be assigned. Next thing you know, its parent/teacher conferences, my daughter’s birthday, and Thanksgiving in November. Then I blink my eyes, and its Christmas.
I wouldn’t be so bad if gifts were cheap and I had all the time in the world to shop online. I mean, why go to the store when you can shop from the comfort of your home and have it delivered to you? It doesn’t get too much better than that! But the things that kids want now are so expensive. Once you have teenagers, gone are the days of buying little trinket toys that you know are going to break in a few days, but you really don’t care because you got them from the dollar store. Gone are the days where you can buy $20.00 toys and not be too upset when you realize that the kids have lost interest in them and/or they are broken after a month. Nope. Once your kids hit middle school, they want the Xbox, Wii, PlayStation and all the games that go with them. After you spent around $300 or more on the console, you still have to get games for them to play!! The games are sold separately. Of course they are! Why include a free game in the box? Now mind you, these games cost at least $50.00 each. And they never want just one game. Nooooo! Are you kidding? They need at least two, if not more. And don’t try to be slick and look for a game that you want and try to pass it off as if you bought it for your kid. I can almost guarantee you that your child won’t like that game. Please. What were you thinking?
When your kids become teenagers, they still want the expensive stuff … new cell phones, even though nothing is wrong with the old ones, IPads, sneakers, a gym membership. Yes, a gym membership. That’s what my 15 year old asked for this year. I actually don’t mind this one. I know that my son will use the gym membership because he wants to join the same gym where his friends go to play basketball, and I would rather have him play basketball at the gym instead of out in the streets. Here’s the thing, I don’t mind giving them nice things. In fact, I want them to have nice things. But let’s be real, these nice things are expensive and these kids don’t have a jobby job!!! And as my mother used to say, money doesn’t grow on trees … but wouldn’t it be nice if it did?
I admit, unfortunately for the parent that pays the bill, that a cell phone is almost a necessity nowadays, but they don’t need the latest smart phone. You know, the one that’s newer than the phone the parent currently owns. An IPad can be used for school work. In fact, some schools want kids to have IPads or Chromebooks. The sneakers will definitely be worn, but, how many pairs do these kids really need? I only have two pairs and I’ve lost track as to how many pairs my son has now. And sneakers aren’t cheap!! I can pay my cell phone bill with the full retail price of one pair of sneakers. Side note, a few years ago, I introduced my son to the Nike outlet where he found a pair of LeBron’s for around $120. Now, every time we pass a Nike outlet, he wants to stop to “see what they have”. I appreciate that he has learned the value of a dollar, but no, we’re not stopping. Anyway, I digress. The point of all this is this, Christmas is here, and I’m not ready! I need another month, or two.
So, if you plan on having kids, make sure you plan better than I did.
Consider yourself warned!
Please tell me, am I the only parent out there who is unprepared for Christmas, Kwanza, or Hanukah?
If you have school aged kids, I know you can relate to this … I can’t wait for school to be over (and we have seven more months to go). I’m tired of doing homework and school projects!!! Let me tell you, kids are going to have trouble at some point with their homework, and they are going to ask you to help them. When that day comes, Google will be your best friend. Now, it doesn’t matter how old you are, trust me, it’s been awhile since you’ve been in school and what they’re teaching now is totally different from what you learned all those years ago.
I remember when my daughter was in the fourth grade learning geometry. I was trying to help her with her homework. I looked at it, had no clue what a vertex was, and had to google it. All I could think was, “I know what triangles, squares, rectangles, circles, and trapezoids are, but damn, I have no clue what this @$!!%& is.” I had to print out a geometry guideline to refer back to the whole time the class was on that topic. Needless to say, geometry was her lowest score in math.
Then, when my son was a freshman in a specialized high school, the principal warned us parents on parent night that eventually we would not be able to help our kids with their homework. I thought, “Oh, this man is exaggerating.” Well, a few months into the school year, I asked my son about his homework. He said that he had finished his homework, but that there was an algebra problem that he didn’t understand and that he was going to ask his teacher about it the next day. I told him that I used to be good in algebra, and I offered to look at it. Why did I even bother? I looked at that math problem and didn’t have a clue as to what was going on! I just looked at him and said, “Oh yeah, you’re going to have to ask your teacher about this tomorrow!”
If it’s not the endless homework and papers to proof read, it’s the projects! I mean, really. Why do we need to have so many projects? All projects are another avenue for me to spend money! I need a big construction paper, I need paint, I need markers, I need index cards, I need construction paper in different colors, I need ribbons, I need colored pencils, I need to go to my friend’s house after school tomorrow because we need to work on the group project together, I need you to help me! All those I need, I need, I need, translates to money, money, and more money! I tell you, I really hate those projects, with a passion.
Once school is over, I will have a good two whole months where I don’t have to think about any of this. Man how I love summer vacation. I can’t wait ‘til June.
Enjoy it now if you don’t have to worry about homework, papers, and projects. Your day will soon come!
Consider yourself warned!
Parents, what do you have to say about this?
SassyGirlTye lives with her two wonderful teenagers in Brooklyn, New York. No matter what she says in her posts, she truly loves her children with all her heart.